A Fort Wayne native's adventures in China
January 2, 2026
Excellent vacation; excellent food. God, wish I could live in Hong Kong. Ah well, at least I got to visit. Met a very nice young lady at Lily Bookstore. So nice to meet people who have gone through the same crap as I have. Nice and warm there too, and today was gorgeous and sunny.
January 1, 2026
Another good day. I bought Drakkar Noir, my Bushman bread, then I went to see that apartment complex catch fire. Scary. When the wind is right, you can smell the burning smell. Found some roast turkey slices at M & S and THIS is what I want and need. It was delicious. So we’ll see wht I can do. Maybe I’ll just have to get a turkey breast and roast it, then cut it up and freeze it. Also got chips and salsa. Changed some of my money back into RMB. Also bought peppermint tea at M & S. Really need one of those stores on the mainland.
December 31, 2025
Had a great day. Found Lily Bookshop and got four books. Bought Crazy Rich Asians and it’s really good. Found a great fish and chips shop called Fish and Chick. Third one was the charm as Hooked and Whitebeard were both closed. Met a really nice girl at the bookstore. We really hit it off. We exchanged information. She’s gone through a lot of the same stuff I’ve been through. Depression. Suicidal thoughts. Nice to know I’m not alone.
No fireworks out of respect for the Tai Po victims. I really hope this is a good year.
December 30, 2025
Back in Hong Kong! Walked for HOURS tonight. Found a bunch of thrift clothing stores, but nothing I really, really wanted. I am worried about my kidneys. But what’s done is done, I guess. Neck and back hurts. Seems like it came on quite suddenly.
Outback was great. So. Much. Food! And the weather is nice too. Cops came to Chungking Mansions, but I guess there was a kerfuffle in black D. Not sure what happened.
After not having gone anywhere for several days (except for walks) I decided I needed to get out. So I went to Ikea and got a couple of bargains. I’m still putting together cheap shelving for my pad, and thought if I could get some small, sturdy shelves, I’d have even more room for my stuff. I picked up a couple of Malm nightstands for $17.50 each. I couldn’t find a wardrobe door for shelving that I liked, but I’m sure there will be one soon. I also got a couple of Baggebo shelves, so I can store some of my smaller appliances. For someone who hates to cook, I’ve somehow acquired a popcorn popper, bread machine, juicer, blender, mandolin slicer, a small oven, and a borrowed microwave. I also have a plastic storage unit for some of my dry foods as well. Not sure if the plastic storage unit will fit with the shelving, but even so, I have plans.
But after my shopping spree, I felt a bit depressed. I’m not sure why. I have had plenty to do this break, but it seems like every break, I get depressed. I’m sure it has something to do with my age, the fact I have no money, and I’m just plain tired of struggling. Shout out to Jami, who says she doesn’t know anyone who struggles so far only to not have anything work out. Thanks so much for at least acknowledging that. It’s hard to hear from people, “Oh, Gloria, EVERYONE struggles.” If you’re driving a car less than two years old, you’re not struggling. If you have a streaming service or two, you’re not struggling. Starbucks five times a week? You’re not struggling. Making more than $9.37 an hour? (I’m not.) Okay, you MAY be struggling, but what have you cut out? I haven’t been to a movie since last summer. No streaming services. I haven’t bought new clothes since two springs ago. Haven’t bought new shoes in over a year.
So I went for a walk. Didn’t make me feel much better, but then when I came home, I couldn’t get in. I tried my usual key. Then I tried my other key. Then I tried my hidden key. Nothing. And it’s spring holiday. Great.
I told a security guard via my translator app what was going on. He tried two of my keys, and nothing. He started calling a few people, and then indicated someone was coming. He had a can in his hand and I knew what it was. SD 80, known in the states as WD 40. I looked at the can in the elevator and chuckled.
And within two minutes, I had access to my cluttered pad. I thanked the men profusely, got myself some water, and fired up the computer.
So as mopey as I am today, I’m grateful someone was available and had bootleg WD 40. I told them it was the worldwide problem solver, and in the states we call it WD 40.
Now, if I could only hide a can of that outside my apartment door.
However, I did submit to three publishers today.
Yes, I’ve written a novel. Two, actually.
But that doesn’t mean I won’t consider having an agent, if anyone wants to represent me…
Reading this might piss you off. That’s the only trigger warning you get.
For several years, I’ve wondered why sexuality matters so much. Gay, straight, bi, trans, non-binary… honestly UGH. UGH.
I guess I’m wondering, “who gives a shit?” Seriously, WHO GIVES A SHIT?
Sexuality, like your bowel movement habits, should be private. Honestly, I don’t care who you sleep with, or want to sleep with, as long as it’s not harming anyone. But I don’t want to hear about it.
It’s in the news a lot. From that one visual arts teacher (art teacher, in old school speak) who had students fill out a survey about whom they thought “hot” from Olympic athletes talking about the LGBT struggle, to the Brothers Esposito wanna be who shot up an ice rink in Rhode Island, sexuality is on everyone’s minds lately.
For years, I had no one to turn to when I told people men hated me. They blew me off, not caring that for decades, I wanted a boyfriend but couldn’t get one. They finally came up with a term for it, “incel”, except that was hijacked by men. Incels claimed that women couldn’t possibly be incel, because men are constantly throwing themselves at us, and if we didn’t have a man, it’s because we didn’t want one.
Oh, I tried to explain myself. But people would go flinty-eyed at my explanations, with a few of the bolder ones saying maybe I ought to try dating women. Because, you think… I’m lesbian? I’m not. Never. From day one, I fantasized about boys/men (I didn’t care about age, honestly) but I never had a boyfriend until I was 39. That’s a hell of a long time to wait for your first relationship.
They STILL don’t get it. I could point out those incels are basically “volcel” that is, voluntary celebate, because they won’t date just ANY woman. No, these incels want supermodels. Think they deserve supermodels. After a while, I just gave up. I knew I wouldn’t be getting the kind of man I really wanted, because those kinds of men don’t want women like me. It’s okay, there are a lot of women who don’t want men who are like incels. And I don’t believe that old saying, “there’s someone for everyone.” What if my perfect true love is a Polish potato farmer? I have no interest in going to Poland, so I doubt we’ll meet. And long-distance relationships are fragile, to say the least. And if you mix it up with totally opposing cultures/languages/religions/countries, it means that you’ll have to budget for trips. Having grown up poor, I kinda figured that trip to Puerto Rico we all took back in 1979 was the first AND last time we’d ever travel together as a family. Even quick weekend jaunts were out of the picture. It’s like we reached our financial limit of family vacations. I don’t remember ever going anywhere as a family on a trip again. So yeah, yay for your long-distance Turkish boyfriend, but I don’t see it lasting. Sorry.
But getting back to sexuality, why does it have to be in everyone’s face? Why even do we have to express it? I get wearing cool clothes and looking good. I get that. But sexuality for me is a super private thing. I HATE when people ask me if I’m seeing anyone. Because I never am. Men don’t want what I have to offer. And I’ve pretty much accepted that.
Back in the days when I let my lack of boyfriends run my life, I got NO sympathy from anyone. People couldn’t understand it when I said “men hate me.” Never a single ounce of respect or understanding. So I’m sorry if the LGBT community, or people confused about their gender are looking for sympathy. Just as people can’t understand men hating me, I can’t quite understand not wanting to be a certain gender. Yes, men hate me, but it never, ever made me wish I was a guy. Or that I was lesbian. I just had to deal with it.
I’ve not watched a lot about the Olympics, but I’m well aware of the political points athletes have made. Unfortunately, the Olympics have always been political. Whether it’s Soviet Cold-war era superiority, the 1980 hockey team victory signifying the superiority of scrape by as you train capitalism vs. state-funded training facility communism, 1968 Mexico city (Tommie Smith and John Carlos’s Black Power Salute), or Vera Caslavka’s head down and turned to the side during the playing of the Soviet national anthem (also in Mexico City) there’s always going to be politics. Unless you can deal with the aftermath, best just keep your mouth shut. In other words, be like Switzerland. I don’t see anyone pissing on them for being neutral. In private, you want to complain about how hard it is to be whatever it is you are, fine. But being an Olympic athlete and complaining, that’s something that people aren’t very sympathetic about. You’re young, good-looking for the most part, in great shape, and you can do a sport very, very well. That’s something 99 percent of the U.S. population cannot be or do. Yes, you’re human. Yes, we think a little differently about mental health these days. But Americans expect a LOT. If you are the favorite in any sport, you bet people are going to crucify you for coming in anything but first place. It was bad before social media, now it’s even worse.
Perhaps the entire United States population needs some education about diplomacy. I’m not sure if I’d be trash talking the current administration on the world’s stage. I certainly wouldn’t be bringing up my lack of boyfriends for most of my life situation, because again, WHO CARES? It has nothing to do with my athletic ability. Being LGB has nothing to do with your athletic ability.
Now, being trans, yeah, that has something to do with your athletic ability. I read somewhere a high school boy’s soccer team beat the women’s national team. Men are just stronger and taller. I repeat: MEN ARE STRONGER AND TALLER. Not to mention, more violent. I’m wondering how many female to male trans people have committed gun crimes. The dude (I REFUSE to say “she”) who shot up the arena in R.I. was male transgendering to female. And it seems changing his ethnicity as well. Robert Dorgan told people to call him “Roberta Esposito.” Esposito, for those of you who aren’t of a certain age, is the last name of two hockey playing brothers, Phil and Tony Esposito. Not only did he not want to be male and Irish, but he wanted to be female and Italian, it seems.
The New York Post identified Dorgan as trans, but went a bit deeper, suggesting that he was a right wing sympathizer, and had posted racist comments, promoted white power, and even had a Nazi SS tattoo. I don’t know; none of that sounds very “lefty” to me. Especially his support of the second amendment.
So surprise, surprise, transgenders can be right wingers. And they can be just as dangerous as straight men with guns. Who would have thought?
I always feel bad for people who get married, only to have their partners come out years or decades later, or their husband decides he wants to be a woman. And can we get this straight (pardon the pun?)–gender matters. I know if I ever met the man of my dreams and one day he decided he wanted to be a woman, yes, I’d divorce him. You can love that person, but not in a sexual way if you don’t swing that way. Because if you did, you wouldn’t have married a man if you were into women, right? And if you’re bi, God bless you. You have twice as many chances of hitting it off.
But please. Your sexual orientation means nothing. Not for a job, not for a sport. Well, unless you are a male prostitute who only wants to sleep with men. THEN it matters. But can’t we keep that shit private? Who you sleep with shouldn’t be the sole focus of who you are. If you have problems with your sexuality, see a therapist. Don’t harm yourself and others.
And that’s where I went for dinner tonight. I usually order my hamburger plain, with just onion, but you’d be surprised how that simple request gets screwed up.
It happened tonight.
First, it was a burger with the works.
I explained what I wanted.
Round two was a burger with onion, cheese, and whatever sauce they put on it.
I explained again, with my translator app, what it was I wanted.
They looked at my app as if I’d written it in Greek translated to German.
They finally got it right.
But this isn’t uncommon. For weeks, the staff at Burger King always thought I wanted it WITHOUT onion, so they’d put everything on there EXCEPT onion.
I finally took a picture of my burger, the way I wanted it, and started showing it to them.
Tonight’s burger was good.
Yes, I went to see the fireworks, since the display in Hong Kong was canceled out of respect for the Wang Po fire victims.
Sounds like one, on this misty Monday in China. Happy Lunar New Year!
Things are gearing up for the new year! I hope I can go see the fireworks. Strange as it may seem, I never seem to know EXACTLY when Chinese New Year is. Depending on people’s schedules, some people disappear for a full week or two before the actual new year. But I guess the fireworks officially starts on February 17, at 8 p.m. here in Fuzhou.
Even if you Google it, it says, “dates may vary” but it says February 17 to March 3. CNY is late this year.
I’ve been staying at home, watching tons of YouTube, staying in bed outrageously late, but feeling a bit more energized than I have been for the last several months. I’ve been doing some cleaning and organizing. I still have way too much stuff though. I fear I will always be a clutterbug.
But for now, I’m happy. I need to enjoy it.
You know when you go to the bathroom for number 2 and you sit there and you do a wipe and absolutely nothing is on the toilet paper?
Well, today, number two exploded out of me and I sat there for five minutes and went through several paper towels (out of toilet tissue) and it seemed like it would never stop.
And now you know how part of my morning was.
Shout out to Bob H. a faithful reader, through all my starts and stops and starts again. Thank you.
So yeah, compared with the dreck I normally attract, the ladies’ dates seem like dream men who have small flaws. And please—you can’t tell me a big dick is all of what women want. I personally think the sexiest part of a guy is his brain. But what do I know?
Late to the party? Check out the beginning here: https://nowaylaowai.home.blog/2026/01/31/this-is-for-the-sex-and-the-city-fans-were-talking-satc-boyfriends/
Want to shout out to my new subscriber! My numbers continue to go up!
But Carrie isn’t happy and the girls find out and Big arrives right after Petrovsky accidentally hits her. Big and Carrie make up and they go on to get married.
My point was, the shit the girls complained about were such superficial problems, made me roll my eyes. Just about every guy they dated was successful in some way. Even bartender Steve went on to have his own bar. Comic book guy had HIS OWN BUSINESS. How many guys did the ladies date who were unemployed, had bad hygiene, weren’t particularly educated, dressed terrible, had zero class, bad grammar, overly horny, or homeless?
Part of the reason I think this show was so popular is because it really WAS a fantasy. Women watched it thinking they too might have good jobs or own successful businesses, and have nothing really earth-shattering affect them. They didn’t have to worry the guys they dated might be serial killers or serial rapists. For the most part, they were good-looking, had nice builds, good hygiene, good breath, etc., etc. and no arrest records. Yeah, Samantha DID get cancer, but presumably she had insurance and enough money to get her through. The last person I know who got cancer worked full-time at Lowe’s and probably didn’t have $100K saved for emergencies.
Late to the party? It starts here: https://nowaylaowai.home.blog/2026/01/31/this-is-for-the-sex-and-the-city-fans-were-talking-satc-boyfriends/
But could ANYTHING/ANYBODY satisfy Carrie? I’m thinking no. She bitches at Big for his crappy dating behavior, yet does the same thing to Aidan. Bitches at Petrovsky for being “too romantic” instead of just romantic enough. Bitch, he BOUGHT that pink dress for you. That wasn’t enough? The poem he recited wasn’t enough? Dancing at Lincoln Center wasn’t enough?
So of course Petrovsky wants to go back to Paris. Having broken up with Big because he didn’t tell her IMMEDIATELY that he might have to go to Paris for a few months, they break up, but not before splattering McDonald’s all over his kitchen. But a friend of hers falls out of a window, and Carrie decides she’ll go to Paris, even though she can’t speak the language, and has nothing to do all day. She and Big have one last big blow up, saying that whenever she finally feels happy, Big comes along and screws it up. (He does.)
I think the reason people hated Berger so much is that he and Carrie were so much alike. Slightly kooky, self-deprecating, insecure, both writers, insecure, spent money on stupid stuff (overpriced clothes for her, motorcycles for him), and did I mention INSECURE?
Carrie DID buy him a nice shirt (which Berger looked delicious in) but prior to that, he remarked that a shirt that expensive should come with a studio apartment. Carrie was able to buy it for him because she just got an advance check from France. Yay for you, but have some sympathy for your fellow writer, who just got dropped from his publisher. Instead of a shirt, you might have asked him if he needed help with rent or something. I’d be a bit pissed if someone flaunted a $20,000 check in my face after I’d told them I lost my job, but that’s me. So sorry if I’m not jumping down with glee at your hard work. I’d invest that shit, but who am I? Carrie, instead of being financially responsible, blows 10 percent of it on a shirt for a guy she won’t ever see again. If anything, she should have bought something for Big. After all, he DID write her a $40,000 check so she could buy her apartment after Aidan evicted her. And since she insisted that Big was “in her life” and she couldn’t completely cut ties, he deserved something for coming back to such a nutty broad. So yeah, naaah, naaah, nah, nah, naaaaah to all you Berger haters.
You hate him because he’s male Carrie.
I love him because he’s Ron Livingston, hottest man on the planet.
Late to the party? See where it all began! https://nowaylaowai.home.blog/2026/01/31/this-is-for-the-sex-and-the-city-fans-were-talking-satc-boyfriends/
Berger was insecure, but not as much as Carrie.
Carrie laughed at him because one of the characters in his book was wearing a scrunchie. Carrie said NO NYC WOMAN would be caught dead wearing a scrunchie, and proved it when they saw a woman in a restaurant. The woman was from Macon, Georgia, and was thrilled someone mistook her for a local.
Meanwhile, Carrie freaks out whenever she had a book released, especially if Michiko Kakutani didn’t like it. After a less than flattering review, Carrie asked a friend once (might have been in AJLT) if she thinks Carrie thinks men are “disposable.” By this time, she’s rich as fuck, and if she never has another best-selling book, she ain’t gonna starve.
Late to the party? This is where it all begins! https://nowaylaowai.home.blog/2026/01/31/this-is-for-the-sex-and-the-city-fans-were-talking-satc-boyfriends/
One of her last relationships is with writer Jack Berger, who has been unofficially crowned CARRIE’S WORST BOYFRIEND EVER. All because he broke up with her on a Post It note. I find this crappy behavior, but consider this:
Berger NEVER hit Carrie.
Yes, he was insecure, but he was coming off a break up with Lauren, and then, when he was with Carrie, his publisher dropped him. There are people who commit suicide for less serious reasons than this. I’m sure he wasn’t feeling confident at this time, but the hard-core SATC fans won’t give Berger a break. But if the same thing happened to Carrie, her girls would have rallied around her. And if Berger had gotten a big advance check and blew it all on dude stuff, he’d be labeled, “insensitive.” He earned his money. Just like Carrie did.
Berger wanted a break. He came back, and quickly realized it was a mistake. And left. And didn’t come back. Unlike Big who always seemed to know when Carrie was happy and did the “I need to talk to you” speech until she broke down.
Late to the party? Start here:https://nowaylaowai.home.blog/2026/01/31/this-is-for-the-sex-and-the-city-fans-were-talking-satc-boyfriends/
Aidan was stupid to come back not once, but TWICE. He allowed Big to come up and complain about his woman, getting so drunk he was forced to stay overnight. Aidan should have thrown them both out into the rain. I mean, Big DID say he could get his driver to come up, right? And Carrie could have driven Big back, but if either of those had been chosen, we wouldn’t have had the middle-aged men fight in the mud scene, would we? We can’t ever forget Carrie screaming, “You HAVE to forgive me, you HAVE to forgive me!” Bitch, WHAT? If anything, I think I hate Aidan the most, because he had no spine at all. Bitch cheated with him in Big and Natasha’s bed, came up to the cabin, STAYED OVERNIGHT IN THE CABIN, and yes, proposed to Carrie anyway. And then his nasty side came out.
Next post: the money shot. I talk Berger and why he wasn’t nearly as bad as everyone thinks he is.
Late to the party? See where it all began! https://nowaylaowai.home.blog/2026/01/31/this-is-for-the-sex-and-the-city-fans-were-talking-satc-boyfriends/
Carrie went out with some interesting types. She fucked up big time with that super normal guy, then had to start rooting around in his “secret box” while he was out playing basketball. Big floated in and out while she took her time with certain men. Aiden was just too nice for her. But he was a bit of a bumpkin too. Reluctant to fuck her, Carrie was wondering why he didn’t nail her within the first two weeks of their relationship.
With Samantha, we heard about “funky spunk” guy, but she was a serial dater, so it didn’t much matter who she got with. I remember the woman artist she was with and the guy with a small dick, but that’s about it. Oh, Richard, and of course Smith. I thought Richard was a dick, and Smith was okay. Younger than everybody, but at least he was nice to Samantha during her cancer battle.
Late to the party? See the first post here: https://nowaylaowai.home.blog/2026/01/31/this-is-for-the-sex-and-the-city-fans-were-talking-satc-boyfriends/
See where it all began: https://nowaylaowai.home.blog/2026/01/31/this-is-for-the-sex-and-the-city-fans-were-talking-satc-boyfriends/
Previous post here: https://nowaylaowai.home.blog/2026/02/01/sex-and-the-city-boyfriends-continued/
Charlotte, the wholesome, seemingly innocent sorority girl, got a serving of “Dirty Talk Guy” and the “White Knight” who left a trail of recently slugged men in his wake. She was probably the most likely to die at the hands of a serial killer. But she skipped the ear plugs and got rid of Sluggo. She ended up with a somewhat nebishy New York lawyer who didn’t seem like her type either. He certainly didn’t fit Charlotte’s type: WASPY New York banker types who graduated from prep schools and expensive colleges.
Hey! I have a YouTube channel too, and the stats really are blowing up! Thanks for looking! Here is one of my better efforts: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B69_gn2-V08
If you want to know what Hong Kong Disneyland looks like (from a cynic’s eye) take a look!
Late to the party? Read the post below to get started!
Remember Miranda’s “Catholic Guy”? Her beef was that he always showered after sex. That’s bad?
My one and only boyfriend stood in front of me once and asked me if I smelled bad. I smelled him and told him he seemed okay, but I asked why I was smelling him. He said he couldn’t remember the last time he showered. I told him to take a fucking shower.
So Miranda, does Catholic Guy seem so bad now? Well, dumb question. She hooked up with Steve, who supposedly has decent hygiene but a hefty body count. Steve had that refreshingly “young” vibe about him, but had strangely unrealistic goals for his and Miranda’s relationship. He wanted to have a baby with her, but settled for a puppy. Then they actually had the baby, and considering the writers and their gay bosses, did what we all knew she was going to do and kept the baby. Of course she did! She’s Miranda! She’s Superwoman! What I wonder is why she didn’t go for someone more ambitious, but then love is strange, I guess. We envision people with certain types of people, then we get floored when the drop-dead gorgeous woman ends up with a toad for a husband. Or some tall, skinny guy ends up with a butterball. Or someone with decent manners ends up with someone raised in a barn. Steve had skid-marks, which is disgusting. But that’s what happens when you do your boyfriend’s laundry. Samantha would NEVER have put up with that bullshit.
Next: Talk dirty to me, Charlotte
It’s a long one, but I’m breaking it up into several parts. It will be a thought-provoking week. And huge thanks to the people reading my blog! The numbers have been great (for me, at least!)
I remember the phenomenon of Sex and the City. We must not have had HBO. I shared a hotel room with some friends on a trip and getting excited about watching an episode. And no, I can’t remember what episode it was.
The show seems a bit problematic now, but one of the things that irked me about the show were the boyfriends. The ladies were complaining about them. And I’m thinking, “What the fuck are you complaining about?” Why?
Because the men aren’t all that terrible. The things women were complaining about were minor.
Hear me out. Did the women honestly have to worry about being murdered? No. These days, when women go out, they have to update their friends, especially when dating someone new.
Back then, was it different? It sure seemed like it. Because the women were complaining about stuff that made me roll my eyes.
Next post: Catholic Guy wasn’t that bad, Miranda.
But it doesn’t necessarily mean I can relax. But hopefully the major part is done. Maybe I can get out of the house more, or get some stuff done.
I’m almost done with grading and I was focusing on that. So hopefully I’ll have better content soon. I didn’t upload before midnight tonight, so it may show up as me skipping a day on my record. Oh well.
I got up to get my meds from the hospital, picked up Spring Festival gifts, then went back to bed and slept. I should not have done that. But it was cold and gloomy, and on my walk tonight I was nearly home when it started to sprinkle
Good timing.
In China, kitchens don’t have hot water.
And they don’t sell Dawn Dishwashing Liquid unless you buy it online.
So I feel like unless I have Dawn on hand, my pots and pans are greasy. And not as satisfying to wash, because I know Dawn really works.
And I just washed some dishes now, in freezing cold water.
In other apartments, I’d bring my dishes to the bathroom so I could wash them there.
Sometimes I bring a few items to the bathroom to wash, but sometimes I fill a bowl with hot water and bring it to the kitchen sink.
But it’s a pain.
In other news, I baked cookies tonight. I shouldn’t have done it, but I did.
Grading essays and I got a chuckle when a student misspelled “public” as “pubic.”
Yes, I’m 12 years old.
I must have miscounted, or else I’m grading someone else’s class’s exams. Not sure how I ended up with 85 exam papers to grade, but whatever. Got 17 done tonight. I’ll chip away at them.
Wasn’t so bad. But it was a bit tense.
But time to get back on the low carb diet. I really felt it these past few days. Lethargic, wanting to nap, ugh. If nothing else, I gotta stick with it so I continue to feel like living.
I’ve been taking a break from eating low carb. I definitely notice a difference. Despite going low carb for three weeks now, I’ve not seen a difference in my weight. But I HAVE felt a difference in terms of energy and great blood sugar levels.
My blood pressure is up too, but some blood pressure medicine is helping with that. I’ve also tried to get out about five times a week for exercise. I walk for an hour, then come back to my complex and jog around the courtyard for 10 minutes. Sometimes I cap it off with belly dancing. I SHOULD do an intense half hour of core workouts. That, plus a diet of celery and water, might take off 000000000.1 of an inch off my stomach.
Really, it’s frustrating to go low carb and not see a difference on the scale. So I decided to “treat” myself for a few days. Right away, I’ve noticed a difference. Harder to get to sleep, brain fog, and a general lethargy.
But I ordered some ketone testing strips, and they came right away. I was thankful for this, because the first strips I ordered weren’t what I wanted, after I’d opened the package. Ketone testing strips come in a little tube with tiny squares on the side. The object is to pee on the little testing strip, and see if it turns color. If it’s turning purple, your body is burning fat for energy. The strips I ordered tested protein in urine. Realizing my mistake, I placed a second order, which came the next day.
I’ll get back on low carb on Monday, and see if I can do an absolute no carb day. This would mean eating nothing that had carbs at all. Even at 20 carbs a day, I could go for a walk and a jog and possbily bring the number of carbs I have on that day to zero. Calories burned is easy to find; carbs burned is a bit harder.
Because I’m taking a break from carbs for a few days, I bought some strawberries and drenched them in whipped cream. I also loaded up on cherry tomatoes and radishes. Soaking bacon in water before frying takes down the salt content a little. Although I probably shouldn’t be eating so much of it.
Which is why when I was in Hong Kong, I was so glad to be across the street from a Marks and Spencer, which sold small packages of cut up turkey. It’s something I’d like to see here in the mainland, except turkey is not common here. Duck is, which is something that I CAN have, except I’m not used to seeing so many bones in meat.
When I saw someone puking by the side of the road.
Was it food poisoning, or was he just drunk?
We’ll never know.
Here it is! Had two awesome naps in my office today. I achieved REM sleep!
On Facebook, there’s a group that I am in and follow, and it has to do with work. Frequently, people post requests for advice in finding jobs. The posts go a little something like this:
Hello! I’m currently employed, but my job is driving me crazy. I don’t get acknowledged for the hard work I do, and the person who sits behind me eats crunchy food, which annoys me. I’d love to work from home. Actually, I NEED to work from home because I can’t stand being around other people. I don’t have a degree, but I have 20+ years in the workforce. I have ADHD, Autism, I’m allergic to nuts, have a bad back so I can’t lift more than 10 pounds, and I’m on several medications. Does anyone know of a job where I can work from home, doesn’t require a degree, not have the boss breathing down my back, adequate support if I run into a problem, great insurance and be paid at least $25 an hour? Thanks!
Please bear in mind I’m not really mocking these people. I’m here to say, “work is a four-letter word.”
When I was younger, it never really occured to me I could make a living doing what I liked. That period of time only happened maybe once, and it was for three years. I STILL wasn’t able to write about whatever I wanted; that had to come in the form of a ‘zine I published myself. I offered to write movie reviews, but was downvoted on that because if the one movie theater in town was running a movie I didn’t like, well, there go the profits.
And it still kind of blows my mind that people look for that in terms of jobs. I get that people don’t really want to do something they hate for a living, but to me, a job is a way to get money. It’s nice if you DON’T hate your job, but it’s rare to enjoy it. So the idea of having a way to make money that I actually enjoy really sort of shocks me. Is that how life really works?
And I’m well aware the difficulties disabled people have to deal with in order to find work. Especially work that supports at least one single person. With the way rent is now, I think the average person should be pulling down $4,000 a month after taxes, if not just a bit more. How many grocery shelf stockers are earning that kind of coin?
How many cashiers?
How many office workers?
How many work from home employees?
I’ve pretty much decided that when I do decide to go back to the United States, I’ll have to change careers. It’s going to be a hell of an age to do that, but I will say the career that I’m planning to train for (yet again) got me a job when I needed it. And it got me another job when I needed it. Then I stopped doing it because I got moved to another part of the company. But I ended up staying another eight and a half years. Not bad for a place I thought I’d be at for three years tops.
But yeah. It kind of tickles me when these people post these job requests. If you want a job, you do the job that needs doing. Never mind whether or not you like it. You want work, THIS is what you do. Need additional training? Suck it up and do it. I can ill afford to be like some of these people, who say they’ve been out of work for two years. How the hell are you surviving? Did you have $100,000 saved up and that’s what you’re living off? You’re just waiting around until someone hires you?
Personally, I don’t have the patience. I’d look for what needs doing NOW, blue collar, white collar, pink collar, whatever the fucking color collar, get training and do it.
I’ve reached the point in life where I will probably never have my dream job. When I come home, whenever that is, I just want a job. Something where I get decent training, they don’t expect me to learn everything on the job in 30 seconds, somewhere they won’t penalize me if I have a question, and I make more than $15 an hour.
My God.
I sound like THEM now.
I still felt pretty decent though. Worked on grading, then I went out to get some chicken and go for a walk and then a brief jog.
And that was my January 20, 2026.
So the high blood pressure medicine is working. But my back for some reason is sore. My hips are a bit sore too, so I don’t know what this is, but it’s all rather sudden. So I had some TCM at the hospital today.
I normally like massages, but I’m not overly fond with the ones I’ve received in China. In several public spaces (including the train station) you see these massage chairs. I tried one out, and it was awful. I wasn’t relaxed, I was sore as shit.
And even the human massages kinda hurt too.
Today was a bit different. The hospital set me up with a massage table, and I had a couple of people work me over for 25 minutes. They had some sort of oil they massaged into me. At times, it felt really, really hot. Almost like there was a wand someone was holding that had heat in it and they were holding it over my back. A few times I groaned and said it was too hot, but it was taken care of shortly.
Then, after the treatment, I was told not to shower for six hours. Most of the oil was gone anyway, so I didn’t have to worry about it staining my shirt.
I was given a cup of hot tea that is supposed to be good for kidney function. That’s something I’ll have to keep an eye on. The tea wasn’t bad, but it wasn’t delicious. It tasted like watered-down celery. I like celery, so that was fine. I’ve noticed here in China tea isn’t like having tea back home. There’s frequently nothing to put in the tea–forget about sugar, or milk, or even cookies to dunk.
I know, it’s healther.
My back is still a little sore, but it was from the massage treatment, not whatever it is that’s ailing me. It did make my back feel better for a little while.
And I’m feeling better overall. Sleeping better too. Doing more exercise, which is a sure sign I’m feeling better too.
I don’t do well in groups of people. And when I mean groups of people, I mean groups of three or more.
I don’t know why, I just don’t do well. I start to get nervous and bored. I suppose this means I’m a narcissist. But I just don’t want to deal. Like the conversation can center on pizza. Say, likes and dislikes. And I’ll try to chime in with a relevant comment, like, “I enjoy American sausage on pizza, but not Italian sausage, because Italian sausage is just too spicy for me.” And the table goes silent. Like I’d just said, “fried chicken pen holder spasm, nail clipper fun bookshelf turd.”
I passed up an opportunity to socialize tonight, because I didn’t want to hang out with my Chinese teacher and others for several reasons. This get together was put off, because the first time the invite came around, I said no. They postponed the dinner for Sunday, something I didn’t pay attention to. I guess this is so everyone can meet the new teacher. But I am not at my best with groups of people. I’d much rather go one on one. So probably the new guy thinks I’m an incredible snob, but what’s wrong with meeting him at another time?
I’m trying to keep my blood pressure down. The new meds are working, but I’d rather avoid situations where I have to be social with more than one person. It’s stressful. It really, really is.
Yet I can get in front of a classroom and talk everyone’s ear off. Yeah, I don’t get it either. But I figure they aren’t paying attention to me either.
I heard that Scott Adams, creator of Dilbert, died earlier this week. The Reddit post I looked at had people chatting about food instead of Adams, which I thought was strange, but whatever.
I have, somewhere back home, The Seven Habits of Highly Ineffective People, a Dilbert collection. I also had a plus Dogbert and an actual Dilbert doll. It’s funny, but working in a cubicle looked somewhat enviable. I was floundering as a worker, the first of many two-job or more stints in my life. No career, just jobs. Journalism wasn’t really working for me, so I knew I needed to find something else.
I got a kick out of Dilbert. I wasn’t a part of the corporate world, but I’d had my fill of shitty jobs, so THAT part I could relate to.
But even Adams couldn’t avoid the pitfalls of self-expression. You can have opinions, but frequently, people really CAN’T say how they feel or else they’ll lose their jobs. I’m hoping Adams had enough saved/invested so that he was okay. A quick check on the interwebz shows he was worth around $20 million when he died, so I guess he was okay, and would have been okay for a while. But all the money in the world won’t stop cancer, when it decides you’re the target.
I’m sad that he seemed so racist. It just struck me as yet another familiar, but depressing opinion from aging white guys who’ve made a few bucks. I used to admire Adam Carolla when he was on Loveline, but he made a few bucks, and then condemned the rest of us. Funny, these guys seem to end up alone. Adams was divorced twice.
Adams isn’t near my age, he’s more my brother’s age, or WAS, but anytime I hear of a creative person dying, it reminds me that I have two unpublished novels, and I want to get them published. It’s not just a matter of querying publishing houses. The big five won’t accept manuscripts unless they have an agent pushing them. I’m hoping I can start looking when I have a break from school coming up. I know I have to at least try.
And I hope if I do ever make it big, I learn enough to keep my mouth shut.
Thanks to my newer subscribers! You’re probably wondering what the hell happened in the past couple months. Some health issues, keeping up with work, dealing with a hugely annoying person that I plan to limit my time with, and watching the world burn. Hoping I can post more frequently. Computer screw ups aren’t making things easier. I SWEAR I tell myself I’m going to post every day, then the internet lags, I can’t get a good VPN connection, cord won’t charge, blah, blah, blech. If you’re new, I post about stuff that happens to me in China, along with occasional commentary on stuff that may or may not interest you. Eggs are cheap here. $1.26 for 10. Why 10 insted of 12? That’s the metric system, baby.
Just in case anyone cares.
I’m sitting here having a late lunch with a bite of egg and tomato in my mouth when all of a sudden, I have an alarming coughing fit. Like, “are you okay?” fit. Like, “oh my God, she’s been coughing for 20 seconds straight ohmygod maybe she’s choking” fit.
Sometimes this happens to me. Everything will be fine, then all of a sudden, I cough uncontrolably for several seconds. This time I had food in my mouth, and I was mildly concerned I’d inhale it and things would get REALLY exciting.
But, no. I think maybe it was the pepper I’d ground onto my eggs. I think maybe a small piece of it landed on my throat, and my throat said, “fuck that.”
One thing though, about having a coughing fit by myself is I didn’t have someone asking me, “do you want some water?” My mouth is frozen open, my lungs are heaving, there’s still food in my mouth, and you ask me if I want to take a sip of water like I’m some aristocrat? NO! I’ve NEVER understood the logic of asking someone in the middle of a coughing fit if they want water. I don’t understand how pouring water down someone’s throat will help scratch the annoying, ticklish ITCH of whatever triggered the coughing spasm.
And try it sometime. As you’re coughing yourself to death, pick up that glass of water, tilt your head back (ever try to cough while looking at the ceiling?) pour that water into your open mouth and see how that works. Willing to be you’ll be inhaling that water (super healthy, so I’ve heard) and simultaneously spraying it all over God’s creation.
AFTER I’m done with the coughing fit, THEN ask me if I want some water. But not during the spectacle. Unless, of course, you want to be sprayed with a mixture of water, phlegm, and partially chewed food.
Yes, I know this is my first post in a long time. Yes, there’s more to come. But I’ll never figure out why not posting for months increases my views, whereas when I post daily, I get crickets. I also hit a personal high with YouTube in December, where I posted nothing except snarky comments on other videos. My channel hit 10,000 views. Go figure.
And stay tuned.
YouTube: NowayLaowai
Instagram: Chinagrrrl7
It was actually pretty good yesterday. Technology held up, got through stuff from the units, yada, yada, yada. Had pizza for dinner, ordered from Eleme. I finally broke down and ordered from Eleme (food delivery service) for the first time in YEARS last week, when I had a craving for pizza, but not enough to go out in cold weather for it. I felt like a lazy pig, but damn, that pizza was good.
And today’s pizza was good too.
Spent the evening grading papers. I’m almost done.
Depressing when you spend nearly $7 for Granny Smith apples and you slice one open and you see this.
Baopals is just like Taobao, but in English. I’ve had a hankering for American snacks, so I broke down and bought some caramel pretzels from MiniSo. Of course, they don’t come in the American size. We’re talking a bag containing three “snack-size” packages of pretzels.
They were good, but of course they weren’t enough.
Baopals to the rescue. I really wanted some decent cheese popcorn, so I bought some Cretors Chicago Mix. I’d rather have just the cheddar, but the caramel popcorn thrown in is a nice touch too. I got a notice from Baopals that it might take a while to come.
Or maybe I read the wrong thing. Because I got a text saying my orders came in. They included Campbell’s tomato soup, crackers, cocktail sauce, and (insert heavenly choir here) THE CHEDDAR CHEESE POPCORN!
I was very pleased and having two jumbo bags of cheddar cheese and caramel popcorn
Relax. Visiting a hospital in China doesn’t mean automatic bankruptcy. But of course, being an American, any time I have to visit a hospital, my heart rate jumps a bit.
In China, doctors don’t have the status U.S. physicians do. They also don’t have the same pay. But they do hang out at the hospital. None of these “Minute Clinics” or “RediMed” here.
The reason for the visit was because I swore I saw blood in my urine. I’d been feeling really tired for months now, but my blood sugar has been fine and I’ve been exercising on a daily basis. It could be just general depression, but whatever. I’ve been downing vitamins and B-12.
But I felt for a couple weeks, my urine looked… off. So I contacted a couple of colleagues who made a hospital appointment. Luckily it was my day off.
In China, you prepay when you visit a hospital. No, you really don’t know how much it’s going to cost. But you get a card; looks like an ordinary bank card, at the hospital. You stick it into what looks like an ATM, and put money on the card. I think they base it on what you are coming to the hospital for.
We started off at the gynecology department first. It’s not really related to urology, but I passed if they asked if I wanted an exam. My hysterectomy took everything out a while back, so I don’t have anything to worry about there. I felt I just needed a urinalysis to see if I had anything to worry about.
Turns out I didn’t. Everything was fine.
I got paid a few days ago, so today, I spent close to four hours at the bank waiting for them to do a wire transfer home.
I had to go home and get my old passport, because I showed up at the bank without it, and of course, I ended up needing it. The last time I was there a month ago, I didn’t need the old passport.
But not today. I thought about taking it, but of course I didn’t. So I went back home and retrieved it, then went back to the bank and sat, and sat, and sat.
Then to top it off, after everything was done, I wanted to transfer some momey from the account where they put my paycheck, to the account hooked up to my WeChat account.
See in China, they won’t accomodate YOU, you have to accomodate the bank/employer. So if your employer does their banking at ICBC, you have to get an account there. They won’t deposit your check into China Construction Bank. Or any other bank account you may have. Thankfully, I have five bank accounts and never did get around to closing my ICBC account.
But ICBC is where I keep my “emergency” fund. So my paycheck gets deposited into the “emergency fund” then, I transfer some money out from that account (leaving at least 1,,000 RMB in there each payday to build my emergency fund. Then I transfer it to the account that I use for regular everyday spending. It’s a bad idea to have your emergency fund connected to your regular spending account.
However, the folks at ICBC are suspicious that I transfer a good chunk of money into my China Merchants Bank account that is hooked up to my WeChat.
And today, it took even longer than last time to wire money home, which is a good thing I did this on a day that I didn’t have to work. However, doing this cut a huge chunk into my day, and I was tired when I finally got home. I have plenty of papers to grade but I concentrated on getting prepped for tomorrow. The grading can wait.
But it did kind of piss me off. I feel like I am under suspicion every time I wire money home. It even makes me madder that I’m wiring less than $1000 home, because that’s all I can afford. It’s not like I’m doing something illegal. I’m just transferring part of the VERY small paycheck I get back home to cover the bills I have there.
But now you know I spent my Tuesday afternoon.
And to make matters worse, the ATM ate my card. I had to bang on the door to let staff know my card got swallowed. UGH!
A wedding carriage. Young girls stayed in the room until about age 13, when they were married off. This is what they rode in. I was told these girls basically stayed in these rooms until they got married.
Temple at Huang Zuobin’s house. The furniture you see is from a tree that was 300 years old at the time the furniture was made. The wood is 500 years old.
Pottery room.
One of several little courtyards at Huang Zuobin’s house.
I joined the teacher’s union, and they sponsor trips every so often. They gave me a 1545 yuan grocery card, which is about $266. I stocked up on beef, chicken, personal care products and cleaning supplies.
Yesterday, I went on a trip. And that’s part of the reason why I didn’t post anything yesterday. I was beyond tired when we returned. I think I slept for a few minutes on the bus ride back, but when I got home, even though I had lots of papers to grade, I decided to put them off and sleep. And jeez, I certainly did. I think I made it home by 3:20 p.m. or so, and I continued sleeping until the next morning. Yes, I woke up a few times to pee, but it was right back to sleep for me.
I was shocked at how much I slept. But I’m not a morning person. And going to bed late and waking up early is not a good idea, especially for me. But I like these occasional trips. It was a relatively free way (aside from my union dues) to see a different town and to have a good lunch.
Yesterday’s trip took us to a house that was owned by some guy in pharmaceuticals. Huang Zuobin was his name. The house is huge, and big enough to get lost in. Took him 28 YEARS to build. The house is in Minquing County. The house was hit by Typhoon Nepartak and flooded. It took three years, but they restored it.
A bit of history about Huang Zuobin’s house.
A scale model of what the complex looks like.
These thresholds were kind of high. I’ve seen them before, in temples. I’m not sure if they are to ward off vermin, flooding, or what.
A nice little pond in one of the courtyards.
I love going on these trips. After this, we were treated to a delicious lunch in town, which had the food already on the table for us. I tried bamboo shoots (they looked like thin slices of beef) and also yam beans, also known as jicama. I’d heard of this vegetable, but hadn’t had it until now. It sort of has the texture of a pear, but none of the sweetness. It has a very fresh taste, sort of like alfalfa sprouts, but a lot milder.
Then we got to walk around for a while, and one street were really interesting. It was a combination of commerce and living quarters. The windows were decorated with flowers. It was a pedestrian street, and I imagine it would be very pleasant to live above the shops.
I thought this looked both peaceful as well as trendy. The pedestrian street had a variety of shops as well.
After we walked through the street, we made our way back to the bus and went home. The pedestrian street also had a small museum as well.
A raincoat!
The pedestrian street also had a little museum highlighting stuff made in the area, like pottery. There is also a man from the area who became a kick-ass doctor. Wu Mengchao was his name, and he is the founder of liver and gallbladder surgery in China. He also was a trailblazer in international liver cancer research.
Wu Mengchao!
So it was a nice trip, and also nice to ride in a bus and let someone else do the driving. I love traveling by bus and by train here in China. Because I can take a nap any time I want, and also check out the scenery. Lots of mountains here, which is a novelty for this Indiana girl!
Continued thanks to those who read my blog. Check me out on Medium.com. My handle is Gloriajanelldiaz7.
Gaaaah! Late again! VPN isn’t cooperating. Sorry.
I watched Jerry Maguire again the other night and the fact the movie centers around Tom Cruise, Cuba Gooding Jr., and Renee Zellweger, I still don’t believe the Arizona Cardinals are real.
I’d never heard of them before the movie came out in what? 1996? Yeah, 1996. I thought the team had been made up for movie purposes. But no, it’s an actual real team.
How it it I’d never heard of them? Were/Are they really that bad? Our family has always rooted for Green Bay. Of course I knew the Chicago Bears, and Detroit Lions, because before I moved, I was literally just a few hours’ drive time from the former two cities. But Arizona???
I STILL think they’re fictional, but I guess they’ve been around since 1898.
But those are just one of my super stubborn, “I know I’m wrong about this” thoughts that I just can’t give up. I KNOW the Arizona Cardinals are an actual NFL team.
But I still don’t believe it.
I woke up this morning with the worst headache I’ve had in a long time. I get headaches in China, usually right before it’s going to rain. But this was a right behind my right eye, stomach-churning pain that had me wondering if this was a pre-flu trailer.
I took some Walmart Acetominophen, and went back to sleep. I had a mid-afternoon class today, so thankfully I could do that. The pain lessened, so I went to class. But I decided to stay home tonight and get some extra rest. That really helps me if I think I’m coming down with something.
There’s a drama presentation I want to go to tomorrow, so I might spend the majority of the day just hanging around home. Sunday, there’s a day trip I agreed to go on. I really like going on these trips. They sponsored a weekend in Foshan when I was teaching in Guangzhou, and that was really nice. It’s a way to see other Chinese cities for free or next to nothing.
But to have a headache like the one I had this morning was kind of scary. I just looked out the window and the pavement is still dry. So no rain… yet.
It’s been very busy here, and I can’t even look forward to the weekend to relax.
But it isn’t normally like this. It’s just a convergence of stuff to do. Grading, prepping, starting a new Chinese class, English corner two times a week, a drama presentation Saturday night and a full day trip on Sunday.
The day trips sponsored by the school I look forward to, because they’ve been good. It’s a good way to see another Chinese city without the travel costs. As someone pointed out to me, traveling in China is very cheap. Yes, but it isn’t FREE. And if you’re trying to save money, and you make less than $9.50 an hour, maybe you can feel my pain. Apparently lots of people are just rolling in money and can travel all over China. Not me. I’m fucking poor. No matter what I do, nothing gets better.
The drama presentation last year was good, and related to one of the trips I took. I enjoyed the trip so much, I went back this summer to explore more, and I’m glad I did. There was just so much more to the place than I realized.
I don’t think I’ll ever get fluent in Chinese, but whatever.
I’m grateful to whoever is reading. My stats went up in a big way a couple weeks ago. As I’ve told a couple of people, I’d love to say I’m doing spectacularly well, but I’m not. As it is, I just seem to be a cautionary tale.
Lately my blog has been getting way more traffic than usual. I’m not sure why, but thanks! And if you really like my musings about life in China, spread the world!
No Way! Laowai! 
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