A Fort Wayne native's adventures in China
I get super tired on Tuesdays because it’s an all day thing, and I’m not used to working full days, but today went really well. Didn’t eat so well for supper, but whatever. I have to come to terms I may never lose this “last” twenty pounds.
But I’d like to. I just don’t know how hard I’m willing to work for it.
The clutter in my apartment is really starting to piss me off. I’ve ALWAYS had a problem with clutter and it makes me so mad. I tried to find some papers tonight, and I looked in all the logical places, but I couldn’t find them. I have updated replacements I can print out, but still.
It’s frustrating. I don’t know how to make it stop. It’s not like I even go out shopping for junk anymore. The bulk of my money is spent on food, transportation, utilities, and medicine. I haven’t bought new clothes in almost two years. I haven’t bought new shoes in a year and a half. I buy magazines maybe once a year. I can’t remember the last time I bought an actual, real physical book. I think it might have been in 2024.
Anyway, that’s today’s gripe. Junk, junk, junk, junk, and clutter all over the fucking place.
Beef pepperstead and crab rangoon made with real crab. He enjoyed it. Had two servings. I’m not a bad cook, I just hate to cook.
We had another beautiful day today, but I underdressed. I wasn’t wearing a jacket, and so I was cold.
I had to do a wire transfer back home, and sitting in the bank for two and a half hours was hard, because it was cold. I was also very sleepy.
McDonald’s was a bit warmer, but not nearly enough.
I got to school and in my office, the windows were open. I managed to close one, but there were stacks of junk between me and the back window, so that one stayed open. But I fired up the giant space heater/air conditioner. It became bearable.
I also went to class, and that was cold too. And frustrating. The technology in there is a bit complicated, and asking for someone to come and help soaked up more time than I anticipated. So the in-class assignment became homework.
But it wasn’t a bad day, except for being cold.
The teacher’s union I belong to usually sponsors two trips a year, usually to a historical site. I love these trips, because I get to see areas I wouldn’t normally find out about, and there’s history involved.
Today we went to Linpu Village. It played a part in the Civil War. And the descendents of the rulers were named Lin and Chen. It had a school, and what looked like a combination temple and performance area.
It was in a park-like area, and right beside a river. We had beautiful weather.
They rebuilt a temporary palace for the rulers, and we got to wander around inside for a bit. One element I like about the palaces, or at least the bigger houses in Fujian, is that they are sort of open air, but only in parts of the house. There will be little courtyards in the center of some rooms, but on the sides of the rooms, there will be a covered passageway. So even though it might be raining, you can get from one side of the house to the other without getting wet. They had little courtyards like this, and one had a pond complete with koi fish and a little bridge.
We then had dinner at a village not very far from Linpu village. The food was great, just dish upon dish of various things, like orange chicken/pork, cucumber fish, four types of soup, and fruit. Also rice, of course.
After, we went back to campus, and someone invited me to play table tennis. I hadn’t held a racquet in my hand for years, but they paired me up with someone, and after a very little while, felt like I could actually hit the ball. We had several volleys which lasted several seconds, so I didn’t feel like a complete klutz.
So it was a very nice day indeed.
But at least I felt like getting out there and getting some stuff done. Haven’t felt that way in a long time, so getting out on such a beautiful day felt good. Taking a trip tomorrow, and looking forward to it.
Got through the longest, toughest day of the week today. Even felt energized enough to go to Ikea, but didn’t realize they closed at nine. Yes, I was that asshole leisurely walking through a super quiet store, thinking I had plenty of time to check out the Circular Market.
I’m sorry, everybody.
Picked up some more proofreading work today. THIS is the kind of work I enjoy doing!
The first step is recognizing the problem.
Today was one of those surprise days. I didn’t expect to go out, but I did. Two of my colleagues wanted to take me to Three Lanes, Seven Alleys, which is a cultural and historical place in the middle of town.
It was a nice day weather wise. We went to the chocolate museum, and since I’d been there before, I wanted to go to their store to see if they had any chocolate-covered raisins. They are tasting very good to me at the moment, and they are sort of hard to get in China. You can’t just walk into the store and buy them.
So I got some, and that’s all I had planned to buy… but, it’s that kind of place where they have all sorts of really cool stuff. My colleagues took me to a cork-carving store. There are hundreds of examples of these carvings that you can buy. Some are very simple, some are really big and detailed. But I never would have imagined cork, of all things.
I’m doing my best to save money. There’s a LOT of really cool things here in China, but I’m trying to control myself. However, I saw these little coin purses. I’m a handbag freak (they had handbags there too). I may have to go back and get one. But I figured at 35 RMB, I could afford it. That’s only $4.90 USD. It seems sturdy and has enough room for several credit cards, cash and coins.
Then we walked around some more and stopped for snacks, then we all went to the teacher’s canteen on campus and ate. I insisted we have Sweet and Sour Pork as one of the dishes. It was excellent!
So what would have been another Saturday probably spent at home, I got out and socialized a bit, and that was good. As well as needed.
My banana clips came! I’ve been looking for these for YEARS here in China. But the only thing I could find was this.
The piece of crap on the right just doesn’t do it. It has a flimsy clasp, and you can barely open it. I suppose this would work for a five-year-old, with wispy thin hair, but not for me.
It took me years to find one, but the one on the left is the old school, Goody-style banana clip. So named because they curve like a banana, I relied on these as a teen to keep my super thick mane of hair out of the way. Slightly fancier than a ponytail, they gave a literal mane-like look, or a Mohawk replica. I was horse-crazy at the time, so these were okay with me.
I wore it for the first time today and I’m thrilled. After my haircut January 2025 that made me look like a fat lesbian, I’m so glad to have longer hair again. I’m never getting it cut again in China by a professional. I’ll stick with my own handiwork, which served me well for years. And the next time I think I want to change my hair, I’ll just say, “no you don’t.”
I’ll wait until I’m in the capable hands of Kara Bush, stylist at Ulta Northcrest, Fort Wayne, Indiana. She’s a curly girl who knows how to work with curly hair.
But at least I got my 10,000 steps in.
So I finally got to go to Panda World today. It had been closed for renovations for several months. On one of my last vacation days, I went, but didn’t know I had to reserve in advance. So since I don’t have classes on Wednesdays for another four weeks, I went today.
At least it wasn’t raining. I wore double layers on my bottom, and triple layers up top, because for some reason I didn’t want to be burdened with a coat. I chose wisely, as Panda World is built into the side of a mountain and you are either climbing up ramps or steps. So, not wheelchair-friendly. But the way the park is designed, you get the sensation you are among the trees, literally. Kind of appropriate, seeing as that the park is all about pandas.
I was a bit reserved about going here because there are some terrible reviews on Trip Advisor. Claims of kangaroo abuse (?) and pictures of bricks on the ground with kangaroos laying alongside, supposedly knocked out. But what I saw of the enclosures today showed clean environments. Not much was shaking; as it was an overcast, cool day, but I got rewarded with footage of a panda taking a dump.
The giant pandas themselves had spacious living areas that mimicked their natural environment. Plus, each of them had a place they could roam around outside. I never realized how solitary these bears are. I think there are around five giant pandas, and each of them had an indoor area, as well as an outdoor area.
Along with actual animals were indoor exhibits, a museum, several cafes, a decent children’s playground, plenty of places to sit, and also an outdoor theater of sorts, where there are probably demonstrations done.
I’d seen just about everything I wanted to, but the indoor Red Panda exhibit remained elusive. Well, I thought, maybe it was closed. I’d walked back and forth between two signs that supposedly pointed the way to the Red Panda indoor habitat, but couldn’t find it. After I’d ask four people where it was, a volunteer with pretty good English helped me. I pointed out the contradictory signs that indicated the Red Panda indoor habitat was either down hundreds of steps, or along a path behind a huge building.
It was the volunteer’s first day, so he didn’t know where things were either. However, after he convinced me to go down the giant cascade of steps yet again, after the first flight of six steps or so, he turned left and pointed. Sure enough, it said, “Red Panda Indoor Habitat.” Okay fine. But where was the fucking sign that said to TURN LEFT after that first short flight of stairs?
Nowhere, of course. And there was a convenient pole (holding a surveillance camera, of course) that would have been the perfect spot. Because when a sign points you in one direction to seek something out, why would you look over your shoulder on a steep flight of stairs in the OTHER direction?
This lack of courtesy on the park’s behalf cost me about 45 minutes worth of walking back and forth, wondering if I had lost my mind. Even looking at the park map hadn’t helped.
But I found what I’d been looking for. But because Murphy never sleeps, I found the exhibit, with not a Red Panda in sight.
Then, just like that, a little Red Panda came out of his little cottage in the corner and got up on some of his playground equipment, and crossed a log in front of the huge window, only to disappear into a corner. But at least I got to see a live one after all my walking.
I’m glad I got to go. Panda World is definitely worth a visit. I learned a few things (they live solo, only getting together to hook up, then they split again) panda conservation started around 1869, and there used to be 2,400 pandas in the world, but dipped to less than half that in a very short period of time.
And for $7.50, it was well worth the money. If you get a chance, GO! Read my review: https://www.tripadvisor.com/ShowUserReviews-g297405-d1555486-r1051897148-Panda_World-Fuzhou_Fujian.html
I am Nowaylaowai on TripAdvisor
Fireworks at 4:30 a.m. this morning, and fireworks non-stop since it got dark today. Happy Lantern Festival and end of Chinese New Year!
Sounds like a war zone, but it’s much safer here.
Tell me, are things any more affordable in the states? Feel safer? Are you winning?
Had a pizza, went grocery shopping, then took a long walk. Boy, it was warm today.
Having computer issues again. I got a new VPN, which is why I’m here in the first place. But Google Chrome isn’t functioning. I can get access to my passwords, which is fine, but the ease and convenience of being able to spread the word with my posts in a matter of seconds is gone.
Also, when I open my video editing program, it freezes. So I put a bunch of stuff on my external hard drive and put a lot of stuff in the recycle bin, which I’ll dump before firing up the software again.
In other words, I spent too much on makeup today, but at least I got a couple of good duplicates for Urban Decay’s Lounge eyeshadow which was a game changer when I first got it as part of my Ipsy bag, years ago. Make Up For Ever has something called “Beetle Chrome Metallic” and Sephora has a couple of pallets called “Color Shifter.” One was called “Freaky Pink Rose,” and the other one was “Mystic Brown Mushroom.” BOTH pallets have something jaw-droppingly close to Lounge. I wasn’t about to buy them both, but the woman at the register said it was buy one get one free.
And there must have been some additional discount, because I was prepared to pay 159 RMB, which is $22.26 USD, but I got both pallets for around $11 USD. SCORE!
My eyeliner was BOGO too, so yeah, makeup buying spree for cheap today!
Ｗｅｎｔ ｔｏ Ｐａｎｄａ Ｗｏｒｌｄ ａｎｄ ｄｉｄｎ＇ｔ ｒｅａｌｉｚｅ Ｉ ｈａｄ ｔｏ ｒｅｓｅｒｖｅ ｓｉｘ ｄａｙｓ ｉｎ ａｄｖａｎｃｅ．
Ｔｈｅｎ， ｍｙ ｂａｎｋ ｃａｒｄ ｇｏｔ ｓｗａｌｌｏｗｅｄ ｕｐ ｂｙ ｔｈｅ ＡＴＭ．
Ｔｈｅｎ， ｓｏｍｅｏｎｅ Ｉ ｗｅｎｔ ｔｏ ｇｒａｄ ｓｃｈｏｏｌ ｗｉｔｈ ｌｏｓｔ ｔｈｅｉｒ ｄａｕｇｈｔｅｒ ｔｏｄａｙ．
Ａｎｄ ｗｈｉｌｅ ｉｔ ｗａｓｎ＇ｔ ｒａｉｎｉｎｇ ｅａｒｌｉｅｒ， Ｉ ｗｅｎｔ ｆｏｒ ａｎｏｔｈｅｒ ｗａｌｋ ａｆｔｅｒ Ｉ ｇｏｔ ｈｏｍｅ， ａｎｄ ｉｔ ｓｔａｒｔｅｄ ｔｏ ｒａｉｎ．
On WeChat today, someone tickled me and then apologized. They explained they were carrying on two chats at a ttime and they sent the tickle to the wrong chat. “Sorry, I’m old,” they said. I said, “I bet not as old as I am.” The coward didn’t respond with his age.
Yeah, Millennials, tell me how OLD you are while hardly knowing anything about the world. Keep thinking history started in 1993, when you were born. Oh, you’re 40 now. Good God, better start saving up for that casket!
Fuck off. Seriously, just fuck off.
But…
Seems like a lot of YOUNGER people, like those in their 30s, seem to be kicking off. So I guess it makes sense to call 50 something OLD, since those people will never make it. Maybe that’s why they consider 49 “old”.
And since people can’t fucking take care of themselves, it’s no wonder living to say age 58, like me, seems like a herculean feat. When you get type 2 and stage 4 at 36, living past 40 is no longer a guarantee.
But yeah, I’ll continue walking an hour a day, 6-7 times a week, because I actually have the time to. A whole HOUR??? Yes. Sometimes I’ll walk home from the bank after I do a wire transfer home, especially if the weather is nice.
So shut up, Millennials, about all this “old” talk. It makes you look even stupider and annoying.
January 2, 2026
Excellent vacation; excellent food. God, wish I could live in Hong Kong. Ah well, at least I got to visit. Met a very nice young lady at Lily Bookstore. So nice to meet people who have gone through the same crap as I have. Nice and warm there too, and today was gorgeous and sunny.
January 1, 2026
Another good day. I bought Drakkar Noir, my Bushman bread, then I went to see that apartment complex catch fire. Scary. When the wind is right, you can smell the burning smell. Found some roast turkey slices at M & S and THIS is what I want and need. It was delicious. So we’ll see wht I can do. Maybe I’ll just have to get a turkey breast and roast it, then cut it up and freeze it. Also got chips and salsa. Changed some of my money back into RMB. Also bought peppermint tea at M & S. Really need one of those stores on the mainland.
December 31, 2025
Had a great day. Found Lily Bookshop and got four books. Bought Crazy Rich Asians and it’s really good. Found a great fish and chips shop called Fish and Chick. Third one was the charm as Hooked and Whitebeard were both closed. Met a really nice girl at the bookstore. We really hit it off. We exchanged information. She’s gone through a lot of the same stuff I’ve been through. Depression. Suicidal thoughts. Nice to know I’m not alone.
No fireworks out of respect for the Tai Po victims. I really hope this is a good year.
December 30, 2025
Back in Hong Kong! Walked for HOURS tonight. Found a bunch of thrift clothing stores, but nothing I really, really wanted. I am worried about my kidneys. But what’s done is done, I guess. Neck and back hurts. Seems like it came on quite suddenly.
Outback was great. So. Much. Food! And the weather is nice too. Cops came to Chungking Mansions, but I guess there was a kerfuffle in black D. Not sure what happened.
After not having gone anywhere for several days (except for walks) I decided I needed to get out. So I went to Ikea and got a couple of bargains. I’m still putting together cheap shelving for my pad, and thought if I could get some small, sturdy shelves, I’d have even more room for my stuff. I picked up a couple of Malm nightstands for $17.50 each. I couldn’t find a wardrobe door for shelving that I liked, but I’m sure there will be one soon. I also got a couple of Baggebo shelves, so I can store some of my smaller appliances. For someone who hates to cook, I’ve somehow acquired a popcorn popper, bread machine, juicer, blender, mandolin slicer, a small oven, and a borrowed microwave. I also have a plastic storage unit for some of my dry foods as well. Not sure if the plastic storage unit will fit with the shelving, but even so, I have plans.
But after my shopping spree, I felt a bit depressed. I’m not sure why. I have had plenty to do this break, but it seems like every break, I get depressed. I’m sure it has something to do with my age, the fact I have no money, and I’m just plain tired of struggling. Shout out to Jami, who says she doesn’t know anyone who struggles so far only to not have anything work out. Thanks so much for at least acknowledging that. It’s hard to hear from people, “Oh, Gloria, EVERYONE struggles.” If you’re driving a car less than two years old, you’re not struggling. If you have a streaming service or two, you’re not struggling. Starbucks five times a week? You’re not struggling. Making more than $9.37 an hour? (I’m not.) Okay, you MAY be struggling, but what have you cut out? I haven’t been to a movie since last summer. No streaming services. I haven’t bought new clothes since two springs ago. Haven’t bought new shoes in over a year.
So I went for a walk. Didn’t make me feel much better, but then when I came home, I couldn’t get in. I tried my usual key. Then I tried my other key. Then I tried my hidden key. Nothing. And it’s spring holiday. Great.
I told a security guard via my translator app what was going on. He tried two of my keys, and nothing. He started calling a few people, and then indicated someone was coming. He had a can in his hand and I knew what it was. SD 80, known in the states as WD 40. I looked at the can in the elevator and chuckled.
And within two minutes, I had access to my cluttered pad. I thanked the men profusely, got myself some water, and fired up the computer.
So as mopey as I am today, I’m grateful someone was available and had bootleg WD 40. I told them it was the worldwide problem solver, and in the states we call it WD 40.
Now, if I could only hide a can of that outside my apartment door.
However, I did submit to three publishers today.
Yes, I’ve written a novel. Two, actually.
But that doesn’t mean I won’t consider having an agent, if anyone wants to represent me…
Reading this might piss you off. That’s the only trigger warning you get.
For several years, I’ve wondered why sexuality matters so much. Gay, straight, bi, trans, non-binary… honestly UGH. UGH.
I guess I’m wondering, “who gives a shit?” Seriously, WHO GIVES A SHIT?
Sexuality, like your bowel movement habits, should be private. Honestly, I don’t care who you sleep with, or want to sleep with, as long as it’s not harming anyone. But I don’t want to hear about it.
It’s in the news a lot. From that one visual arts teacher (art teacher, in old school speak) who had students fill out a survey about whom they thought “hot” from Olympic athletes talking about the LGBT struggle, to the Brothers Esposito wanna be who shot up an ice rink in Rhode Island, sexuality is on everyone’s minds lately.
For years, I had no one to turn to when I told people men hated me. They blew me off, not caring that for decades, I wanted a boyfriend but couldn’t get one. They finally came up with a term for it, “incel”, except that was hijacked by men. Incels claimed that women couldn’t possibly be incel, because men are constantly throwing themselves at us, and if we didn’t have a man, it’s because we didn’t want one.
Oh, I tried to explain myself. But people would go flinty-eyed at my explanations, with a few of the bolder ones saying maybe I ought to try dating women. Because, you think… I’m lesbian? I’m not. Never. From day one, I fantasized about boys/men (I didn’t care about age, honestly) but I never had a boyfriend until I was 39. That’s a hell of a long time to wait for your first relationship.
They STILL don’t get it. I could point out those incels are basically “volcel” that is, voluntary celebate, because they won’t date just ANY woman. No, these incels want supermodels. Think they deserve supermodels. After a while, I just gave up. I knew I wouldn’t be getting the kind of man I really wanted, because those kinds of men don’t want women like me. It’s okay, there are a lot of women who don’t want men who are like incels. And I don’t believe that old saying, “there’s someone for everyone.” What if my perfect true love is a Polish potato farmer? I have no interest in going to Poland, so I doubt we’ll meet. And long-distance relationships are fragile, to say the least. And if you mix it up with totally opposing cultures/languages/religions/countries, it means that you’ll have to budget for trips. Having grown up poor, I kinda figured that trip to Puerto Rico we all took back in 1979 was the first AND last time we’d ever travel together as a family. Even quick weekend jaunts were out of the picture. It’s like we reached our financial limit of family vacations. I don’t remember ever going anywhere as a family on a trip again. So yeah, yay for your long-distance Turkish boyfriend, but I don’t see it lasting. Sorry.
But getting back to sexuality, why does it have to be in everyone’s face? Why even do we have to express it? I get wearing cool clothes and looking good. I get that. But sexuality for me is a super private thing. I HATE when people ask me if I’m seeing anyone. Because I never am. Men don’t want what I have to offer. And I’ve pretty much accepted that.
Back in the days when I let my lack of boyfriends run my life, I got NO sympathy from anyone. People couldn’t understand it when I said “men hate me.” Never a single ounce of respect or understanding. So I’m sorry if the LGBT community, or people confused about their gender are looking for sympathy. Just as people can’t understand men hating me, I can’t quite understand not wanting to be a certain gender. Yes, men hate me, but it never, ever made me wish I was a guy. Or that I was lesbian. I just had to deal with it.
I’ve not watched a lot about the Olympics, but I’m well aware of the political points athletes have made. Unfortunately, the Olympics have always been political. Whether it’s Soviet Cold-war era superiority, the 1980 hockey team victory signifying the superiority of scrape by as you train capitalism vs. state-funded training facility communism, 1968 Mexico city (Tommie Smith and John Carlos’s Black Power Salute), or Vera Caslavka’s head down and turned to the side during the playing of the Soviet national anthem (also in Mexico City) there’s always going to be politics. Unless you can deal with the aftermath, best just keep your mouth shut. In other words, be like Switzerland. I don’t see anyone pissing on them for being neutral. In private, you want to complain about how hard it is to be whatever it is you are, fine. But being an Olympic athlete and complaining, that’s something that people aren’t very sympathetic about. You’re young, good-looking for the most part, in great shape, and you can do a sport very, very well. That’s something 99 percent of the U.S. population cannot be or do. Yes, you’re human. Yes, we think a little differently about mental health these days. But Americans expect a LOT. If you are the favorite in any sport, you bet people are going to crucify you for coming in anything but first place. It was bad before social media, now it’s even worse.
Perhaps the entire United States population needs some education about diplomacy. I’m not sure if I’d be trash talking the current administration on the world’s stage. I certainly wouldn’t be bringing up my lack of boyfriends for most of my life situation, because again, WHO CARES? It has nothing to do with my athletic ability. Being LGB has nothing to do with your athletic ability.
Now, being trans, yeah, that has something to do with your athletic ability. I read somewhere a high school boy’s soccer team beat the women’s national team. Men are just stronger and taller. I repeat: MEN ARE STRONGER AND TALLER. Not to mention, more violent. I’m wondering how many female to male trans people have committed gun crimes. The dude (I REFUSE to say “she”) who shot up the arena in R.I. was male transgendering to female. And it seems changing his ethnicity as well. Robert Dorgan told people to call him “Roberta Esposito.” Esposito, for those of you who aren’t of a certain age, is the last name of two hockey playing brothers, Phil and Tony Esposito. Not only did he not want to be male and Irish, but he wanted to be female and Italian, it seems.
The New York Post identified Dorgan as trans, but went a bit deeper, suggesting that he was a right wing sympathizer, and had posted racist comments, promoted white power, and even had a Nazi SS tattoo. I don’t know; none of that sounds very “lefty” to me. Especially his support of the second amendment.
So surprise, surprise, transgenders can be right wingers. And they can be just as dangerous as straight men with guns. Who would have thought?
I always feel bad for people who get married, only to have their partners come out years or decades later, or their husband decides he wants to be a woman. And can we get this straight (pardon the pun?)–gender matters. I know if I ever met the man of my dreams and one day he decided he wanted to be a woman, yes, I’d divorce him. You can love that person, but not in a sexual way if you don’t swing that way. Because if you did, you wouldn’t have married a man if you were into women, right? And if you’re bi, God bless you. You have twice as many chances of hitting it off.
But please. Your sexual orientation means nothing. Not for a job, not for a sport. Well, unless you are a male prostitute who only wants to sleep with men. THEN it matters. But can’t we keep that shit private? Who you sleep with shouldn’t be the sole focus of who you are. If you have problems with your sexuality, see a therapist. Don’t harm yourself and others.
And that’s where I went for dinner tonight. I usually order my hamburger plain, with just onion, but you’d be surprised how that simple request gets screwed up.
It happened tonight.
First, it was a burger with the works.
I explained what I wanted.
Round two was a burger with onion, cheese, and whatever sauce they put on it.
I explained again, with my translator app, what it was I wanted.
They looked at my app as if I’d written it in Greek translated to German.
They finally got it right.
But this isn’t uncommon. For weeks, the staff at Burger King always thought I wanted it WITHOUT onion, so they’d put everything on there EXCEPT onion.
I finally took a picture of my burger, the way I wanted it, and started showing it to them.
Tonight’s burger was good.
Yes, I went to see the fireworks, since the display in Hong Kong was canceled out of respect for the Wang Po fire victims.
Sounds like one, on this misty Monday in China. Happy Lunar New Year!
Things are gearing up for the new year! I hope I can go see the fireworks. Strange as it may seem, I never seem to know EXACTLY when Chinese New Year is. Depending on people’s schedules, some people disappear for a full week or two before the actual new year. But I guess the fireworks officially starts on February 17, at 8 p.m. here in Fuzhou.
Even if you Google it, it says, “dates may vary” but it says February 17 to March 3. CNY is late this year.
I’ve been staying at home, watching tons of YouTube, staying in bed outrageously late, but feeling a bit more energized than I have been for the last several months. I’ve been doing some cleaning and organizing. I still have way too much stuff though. I fear I will always be a clutterbug.
But for now, I’m happy. I need to enjoy it.
You know when you go to the bathroom for number 2 and you sit there and you do a wipe and absolutely nothing is on the toilet paper?
Well, today, number two exploded out of me and I sat there for five minutes and went through several paper towels (out of toilet tissue) and it seemed like it would never stop.
And now you know how part of my morning was.
Shout out to Bob H. a faithful reader, through all my starts and stops and starts again. Thank you.
So yeah, compared with the dreck I normally attract, the ladies’ dates seem like dream men who have small flaws. And please—you can’t tell me a big dick is all of what women want. I personally think the sexiest part of a guy is his brain. But what do I know?
Late to the party? Check out the beginning here: https://nowaylaowai.home.blog/2026/01/31/this-is-for-the-sex-and-the-city-fans-were-talking-satc-boyfriends/
Want to shout out to my new subscriber! My numbers continue to go up!
But Carrie isn’t happy and the girls find out and Big arrives right after Petrovsky accidentally hits her. Big and Carrie make up and they go on to get married.
My point was, the shit the girls complained about were such superficial problems, made me roll my eyes. Just about every guy they dated was successful in some way. Even bartender Steve went on to have his own bar. Comic book guy had HIS OWN BUSINESS. How many guys did the ladies date who were unemployed, had bad hygiene, weren’t particularly educated, dressed terrible, had zero class, bad grammar, overly horny, or homeless?
Part of the reason I think this show was so popular is because it really WAS a fantasy. Women watched it thinking they too might have good jobs or own successful businesses, and have nothing really earth-shattering affect them. They didn’t have to worry the guys they dated might be serial killers or serial rapists. For the most part, they were good-looking, had nice builds, good hygiene, good breath, etc., etc. and no arrest records. Yeah, Samantha DID get cancer, but presumably she had insurance and enough money to get her through. The last person I know who got cancer worked full-time at Lowe’s and probably didn’t have $100K saved for emergencies.
Late to the party? It starts here: https://nowaylaowai.home.blog/2026/01/31/this-is-for-the-sex-and-the-city-fans-were-talking-satc-boyfriends/
But could ANYTHING/ANYBODY satisfy Carrie? I’m thinking no. She bitches at Big for his crappy dating behavior, yet does the same thing to Aidan. Bitches at Petrovsky for being “too romantic” instead of just romantic enough. Bitch, he BOUGHT that pink dress for you. That wasn’t enough? The poem he recited wasn’t enough? Dancing at Lincoln Center wasn’t enough?
So of course Petrovsky wants to go back to Paris. Having broken up with Big because he didn’t tell her IMMEDIATELY that he might have to go to Paris for a few months, they break up, but not before splattering McDonald’s all over his kitchen. But a friend of hers falls out of a window, and Carrie decides she’ll go to Paris, even though she can’t speak the language, and has nothing to do all day. She and Big have one last big blow up, saying that whenever she finally feels happy, Big comes along and screws it up. (He does.)
I think the reason people hated Berger so much is that he and Carrie were so much alike. Slightly kooky, self-deprecating, insecure, both writers, insecure, spent money on stupid stuff (overpriced clothes for her, motorcycles for him), and did I mention INSECURE?
Carrie DID buy him a nice shirt (which Berger looked delicious in) but prior to that, he remarked that a shirt that expensive should come with a studio apartment. Carrie was able to buy it for him because she just got an advance check from France. Yay for you, but have some sympathy for your fellow writer, who just got dropped from his publisher. Instead of a shirt, you might have asked him if he needed help with rent or something. I’d be a bit pissed if someone flaunted a $20,000 check in my face after I’d told them I lost my job, but that’s me. So sorry if I’m not jumping down with glee at your hard work. I’d invest that shit, but who am I? Carrie, instead of being financially responsible, blows 10 percent of it on a shirt for a guy she won’t ever see again. If anything, she should have bought something for Big. After all, he DID write her a $40,000 check so she could buy her apartment after Aidan evicted her. And since she insisted that Big was “in her life” and she couldn’t completely cut ties, he deserved something for coming back to such a nutty broad. So yeah, naaah, naaah, nah, nah, naaaaah to all you Berger haters.
You hate him because he’s male Carrie.
I love him because he’s Ron Livingston, hottest man on the planet.
Late to the party? See where it all began! https://nowaylaowai.home.blog/2026/01/31/this-is-for-the-sex-and-the-city-fans-were-talking-satc-boyfriends/
Berger was insecure, but not as much as Carrie.
Carrie laughed at him because one of the characters in his book was wearing a scrunchie. Carrie said NO NYC WOMAN would be caught dead wearing a scrunchie, and proved it when they saw a woman in a restaurant. The woman was from Macon, Georgia, and was thrilled someone mistook her for a local.
Meanwhile, Carrie freaks out whenever she had a book released, especially if Michiko Kakutani didn’t like it. After a less than flattering review, Carrie asked a friend once (might have been in AJLT) if she thinks Carrie thinks men are “disposable.” By this time, she’s rich as fuck, and if she never has another best-selling book, she ain’t gonna starve.
Late to the party? This is where it all begins! https://nowaylaowai.home.blog/2026/01/31/this-is-for-the-sex-and-the-city-fans-were-talking-satc-boyfriends/
One of her last relationships is with writer Jack Berger, who has been unofficially crowned CARRIE’S WORST BOYFRIEND EVER. All because he broke up with her on a Post It note. I find this crappy behavior, but consider this:
Berger NEVER hit Carrie.
Yes, he was insecure, but he was coming off a break up with Lauren, and then, when he was with Carrie, his publisher dropped him. There are people who commit suicide for less serious reasons than this. I’m sure he wasn’t feeling confident at this time, but the hard-core SATC fans won’t give Berger a break. But if the same thing happened to Carrie, her girls would have rallied around her. And if Berger had gotten a big advance check and blew it all on dude stuff, he’d be labeled, “insensitive.” He earned his money. Just like Carrie did.
Berger wanted a break. He came back, and quickly realized it was a mistake. And left. And didn’t come back. Unlike Big who always seemed to know when Carrie was happy and did the “I need to talk to you” speech until she broke down.
Late to the party? Start here:https://nowaylaowai.home.blog/2026/01/31/this-is-for-the-sex-and-the-city-fans-were-talking-satc-boyfriends/
Aidan was stupid to come back not once, but TWICE. He allowed Big to come up and complain about his woman, getting so drunk he was forced to stay overnight. Aidan should have thrown them both out into the rain. I mean, Big DID say he could get his driver to come up, right? And Carrie could have driven Big back, but if either of those had been chosen, we wouldn’t have had the middle-aged men fight in the mud scene, would we? We can’t ever forget Carrie screaming, “You HAVE to forgive me, you HAVE to forgive me!” Bitch, WHAT? If anything, I think I hate Aidan the most, because he had no spine at all. Bitch cheated with him in Big and Natasha’s bed, came up to the cabin, STAYED OVERNIGHT IN THE CABIN, and yes, proposed to Carrie anyway. And then his nasty side came out.
Next post: the money shot. I talk Berger and why he wasn’t nearly as bad as everyone thinks he is.
Late to the party? See where it all began! https://nowaylaowai.home.blog/2026/01/31/this-is-for-the-sex-and-the-city-fans-were-talking-satc-boyfriends/
Carrie went out with some interesting types. She fucked up big time with that super normal guy, then had to start rooting around in his “secret box” while he was out playing basketball. Big floated in and out while she took her time with certain men. Aiden was just too nice for her. But he was a bit of a bumpkin too. Reluctant to fuck her, Carrie was wondering why he didn’t nail her within the first two weeks of their relationship.
With Samantha, we heard about “funky spunk” guy, but she was a serial dater, so it didn’t much matter who she got with. I remember the woman artist she was with and the guy with a small dick, but that’s about it. Oh, Richard, and of course Smith. I thought Richard was a dick, and Smith was okay. Younger than everybody, but at least he was nice to Samantha during her cancer battle.
Late to the party? See the first post here: https://nowaylaowai.home.blog/2026/01/31/this-is-for-the-sex-and-the-city-fans-were-talking-satc-boyfriends/
See where it all began: https://nowaylaowai.home.blog/2026/01/31/this-is-for-the-sex-and-the-city-fans-were-talking-satc-boyfriends/
Previous post here: https://nowaylaowai.home.blog/2026/02/01/sex-and-the-city-boyfriends-continued/
Charlotte, the wholesome, seemingly innocent sorority girl, got a serving of “Dirty Talk Guy” and the “White Knight” who left a trail of recently slugged men in his wake. She was probably the most likely to die at the hands of a serial killer. But she skipped the ear plugs and got rid of Sluggo. She ended up with a somewhat nebishy New York lawyer who didn’t seem like her type either. He certainly didn’t fit Charlotte’s type: WASPY New York banker types who graduated from prep schools and expensive colleges.
Hey! I have a YouTube channel too, and the stats really are blowing up! Thanks for looking! Here is one of my better efforts: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B69_gn2-V08
If you want to know what Hong Kong Disneyland looks like (from a cynic’s eye) take a look!
Late to the party? Read the post below to get started!
Remember Miranda’s “Catholic Guy”? Her beef was that he always showered after sex. That’s bad?
My one and only boyfriend stood in front of me once and asked me if I smelled bad. I smelled him and told him he seemed okay, but I asked why I was smelling him. He said he couldn’t remember the last time he showered. I told him to take a fucking shower.
So Miranda, does Catholic Guy seem so bad now? Well, dumb question. She hooked up with Steve, who supposedly has decent hygiene but a hefty body count. Steve had that refreshingly “young” vibe about him, but had strangely unrealistic goals for his and Miranda’s relationship. He wanted to have a baby with her, but settled for a puppy. Then they actually had the baby, and considering the writers and their gay bosses, did what we all knew she was going to do and kept the baby. Of course she did! She’s Miranda! She’s Superwoman! What I wonder is why she didn’t go for someone more ambitious, but then love is strange, I guess. We envision people with certain types of people, then we get floored when the drop-dead gorgeous woman ends up with a toad for a husband. Or some tall, skinny guy ends up with a butterball. Or someone with decent manners ends up with someone raised in a barn. Steve had skid-marks, which is disgusting. But that’s what happens when you do your boyfriend’s laundry. Samantha would NEVER have put up with that bullshit.
Next: Talk dirty to me, Charlotte
It’s a long one, but I’m breaking it up into several parts. It will be a thought-provoking week. And huge thanks to the people reading my blog! The numbers have been great (for me, at least!)
I remember the phenomenon of Sex and the City. We must not have had HBO. I shared a hotel room with some friends on a trip and getting excited about watching an episode. And no, I can’t remember what episode it was.
The show seems a bit problematic now, but one of the things that irked me about the show were the boyfriends. The ladies were complaining about them. And I’m thinking, “What the fuck are you complaining about?” Why?
Because the men aren’t all that terrible. The things women were complaining about were minor.
Hear me out. Did the women honestly have to worry about being murdered? No. These days, when women go out, they have to update their friends, especially when dating someone new.
Back then, was it different? It sure seemed like it. Because the women were complaining about stuff that made me roll my eyes.
Next post: Catholic Guy wasn’t that bad, Miranda.
But it doesn’t necessarily mean I can relax. But hopefully the major part is done. Maybe I can get out of the house more, or get some stuff done.
I’m almost done with grading and I was focusing on that. So hopefully I’ll have better content soon. I didn’t upload before midnight tonight, so it may show up as me skipping a day on my record. Oh well.
I got up to get my meds from the hospital, picked up Spring Festival gifts, then went back to bed and slept. I should not have done that. But it was cold and gloomy, and on my walk tonight I was nearly home when it started to sprinkle
Good timing.
In China, kitchens don’t have hot water.
And they don’t sell Dawn Dishwashing Liquid unless you buy it online.
So I feel like unless I have Dawn on hand, my pots and pans are greasy. And not as satisfying to wash, because I know Dawn really works.
And I just washed some dishes now, in freezing cold water.
In other apartments, I’d bring my dishes to the bathroom so I could wash them there.
Sometimes I bring a few items to the bathroom to wash, but sometimes I fill a bowl with hot water and bring it to the kitchen sink.
But it’s a pain.
In other news, I baked cookies tonight. I shouldn’t have done it, but I did.
Grading essays and I got a chuckle when a student misspelled “public” as “pubic.”
Yes, I’m 12 years old.
I must have miscounted, or else I’m grading someone else’s class’s exams. Not sure how I ended up with 85 exam papers to grade, but whatever. Got 17 done tonight. I’ll chip away at them.
Wasn’t so bad. But it was a bit tense.
But time to get back on the low carb diet. I really felt it these past few days. Lethargic, wanting to nap, ugh. If nothing else, I gotta stick with it so I continue to feel like living.
I’ve been taking a break from eating low carb. I definitely notice a difference. Despite going low carb for three weeks now, I’ve not seen a difference in my weight. But I HAVE felt a difference in terms of energy and great blood sugar levels.
My blood pressure is up too, but some blood pressure medicine is helping with that. I’ve also tried to get out about five times a week for exercise. I walk for an hour, then come back to my complex and jog around the courtyard for 10 minutes. Sometimes I cap it off with belly dancing. I SHOULD do an intense half hour of core workouts. That, plus a diet of celery and water, might take off 000000000.1 of an inch off my stomach.
Really, it’s frustrating to go low carb and not see a difference on the scale. So I decided to “treat” myself for a few days. Right away, I’ve noticed a difference. Harder to get to sleep, brain fog, and a general lethargy.
But I ordered some ketone testing strips, and they came right away. I was thankful for this, because the first strips I ordered weren’t what I wanted, after I’d opened the package. Ketone testing strips come in a little tube with tiny squares on the side. The object is to pee on the little testing strip, and see if it turns color. If it’s turning purple, your body is burning fat for energy. The strips I ordered tested protein in urine. Realizing my mistake, I placed a second order, which came the next day.
I’ll get back on low carb on Monday, and see if I can do an absolute no carb day. This would mean eating nothing that had carbs at all. Even at 20 carbs a day, I could go for a walk and a jog and possbily bring the number of carbs I have on that day to zero. Calories burned is easy to find; carbs burned is a bit harder.
Because I’m taking a break from carbs for a few days, I bought some strawberries and drenched them in whipped cream. I also loaded up on cherry tomatoes and radishes. Soaking bacon in water before frying takes down the salt content a little. Although I probably shouldn’t be eating so much of it.
Which is why when I was in Hong Kong, I was so glad to be across the street from a Marks and Spencer, which sold small packages of cut up turkey. It’s something I’d like to see here in the mainland, except turkey is not common here. Duck is, which is something that I CAN have, except I’m not used to seeing so many bones in meat.
When I saw someone puking by the side of the road.
Was it food poisoning, or was he just drunk?
We’ll never know.
Not a cloud in the sky. Went for a nice long walk. I’ve been doing well with increasing physical activity. Had a nice talk with someone back home. Also got some work done for school. All in all, a good day.
No Way! Laowai! 
You must be logged in to post a comment.