Finally got some rest

It took nearly three hours at the bank yesterday. Since I don’t have class on Friday until 2, you can bet your ass I don’t get up until I absolutely have to. But insomnia, coupled with having to get up and get to the bank by 8:30 a.m., meant I was tired. I was so tired, I fell asleep at the bank.

Then I had lunch at McDonald’s and went over to the campus in the mountains. I wasn’t early enough to do any work, but that was okay.

Then, I went to the English corner. That was two nights in a row. They didn’t invite me to this one because they felt that English corner two nights a week was too much. But it’s in my contract, so I went. It was a lot of fun. I just sat and talked to students from our school.

So when I got home last night, I didn’t want to do a damn thing.

So I went to bed. Slept super late like always, then I went to feed Campus Kitten. She’s letting me touch her now. She’s still thin and really hungry.

Some people from English corner were talking about going to the fried rice place I raved about, but we didn’t go today. We might go tomorrow, and I hope we do.

And I did get some papers graded, but not all of them.

Instead of rice, I had pasted and cheese garlic bread made from home baked bread. And it’s a beautiful night weatherwise. Today was one of those good days.

And the dinner was cancelled because one of the students had a last-minute rehearsal call. But he brought me snacks. He didn’t have to do that. I was very surprised he bought them and then delivered them to my apartment complex. I already dug into the peanuts, which were good. He also brought a piece of tiramisu, and cashews and a bag of sweet and salty snacks, and some chocolate milk. I love chocolate milk and haven’t had it for a long time. It was really nice of him to do that.

A very good day, indeed.

I’m still posting every day.

Campus Kitten was Hungry Today
The Insomnia was Bad Last Night

The Bank Job

It took nearly three hours at the bank today. I slept badly last night, and I was so tired, I fell asleep at the bank. But hopefully the money makes its way home soon.

And Campus Kitten seemed really hungry tonight.

Campus Kitten was Hungry Today

I made it to her usual waiting place for me around 4:30 p.m. She wasn’t yowling like she was when I first saw her, but she sounded somewhat desperate.

I talked to someone yesterday via WeChat about how much it would cost to transport her home, should I adopt her. I told the pet travel agent the kitten’s story, and she had all sorts of suggestions of how to catch her even though I can’t get onto campus.

I still have to earn her trust though. She’s let me pet her, but it’s not like she CRAVES to be petted. She won’t eat out of my hand yet. I’m scattering bits of food along the bottom bricks of the fence. Maybe someday she’ll climb up and sit there while I pet her.

Next I have to see if there are any good cat boarding places nearby, just in case.

I’m torn. I worry about her, but do I want the responsibilty? I feel like I failed with Daphne. I fostered Summit with a good friend and total animal lover, so she was in good hands. But I felt guilty about leaving Summit. I hope she forgives me. Her health deteriorated, and she was put down about a year and a half ago. She wasn’t the most affectionate cat, but I found her too, and felt bad for her, being so tiny and seemingly alone in the world, eyes sealed shut because of a grass allergy. I took her home, fed her Iams for a year, and she lived for 15 years.

But I still felt I said goodbye in less than ideal circumstances. Getting her into her carrier wasn’t pleasant, and she was probably wondering what the hell was going on. But better than leaving her at the shelter, or with a total stranger.

Feeling a Bit Weirded Out

I had a really great supper. Pepper steak over white rice was good. I woke up this morning with a weird stomach. I found the mint gum I bought the other day and chewed some of that. But it always makes me wonder when I wake up with a bad stomach what caused it.

So I actually had two meals today. Having mint tea for dessert to hopefully ward off the stomach pains.

I certainly slept deep last night. I never know what sort of sleep I’m going to get anymore. It was hard to get out of bed, but I did it. Had to teach yesterday because of the makeup day situation. I had one of my classes write about how they felt about having a long vacation, but having to come in the weekend before for one day, and then come in for a weekend after for one day. Nobody seems to like it. They don’t like having their plans disrupted, and it throws them off schedule.

Because of this, I have them play Scrabble. This Saturday class I had I had them write dialogue using the words they made during the Scrabble game. It’s an oral English class after all.

Maybe I’m upset about Diane Keaton. I only really knew her from The Godfather and Annie Hall, but I always wonder if I should go, would I be satisfied with what I’d done? I’ve got a novel I want representation for, but I fear I’ll have to self-publish. It’s not necessarily a bad thing, because that IS an option, but somehow it feels like failure. I want to have a bit of money to promote it this time.

It could be I’ve come to terms with my life. Like some things will never, ever, change, and I’d better be okay with that or risk permanent unhappiness. And for every hour I indulge in something mindless, it also reminds me I’m nowhere near where I want to be, and time’s running out. It always has been running out, but if you run into never-ending setbacks, you wonder if you should still go on.

There are so many things I wish I had the courage to change, so many people I wish I would have stood up to and said, “fuck off!”

But I also realized standing up for myself doesn’t get me anywhere either, except the “quit or be fired speech.”

Goodnight, everybody.